Sometimes I feel so overwhelmed by food, and so many emotions attached to it, that I wonder if maybe I'm causing my own stomach aches just with all the guilt, worry, stress etc that goes along with eating it. I'm sure many of you have experienced the anger, the sorrow, the pain, and the confusion that accompanies the life of a glutard, or any other allergy stricken individual.
This month has brought on a lot of confusion, and frustration. Thinking that my body should be feeling better, and not have any somach issues etc. And yet there have still been many. I've been tired and sluggish (although that could be due to the insane amount of times I get up with children at night). But today as I was listening to President Monson's Conference talk (thanks to my three year old who saw his picture on the computer and asked to listen to general conference), something he said really touched me. He asks us to look for the blessings in our lives, not dwell on the negitive. Which is no easy task for me, as I tend to be somewhat negative. Then he reminds us that if we pray for answers we will get them. He also reminded me that NO need is too small or insignificant. As I thought about what I consider to be my "insignificant" issues - fatigue, stomach aches, food complexes etc. I felt the confirmation from the spirit that, like President Monson said, "Our Heavenly Father is aware of our needs and will help us as we call upon Him for assistance." No matter how small we think our needs are. It may not be in the way, or time that we would like but he will. I have been praying a lot lately, but sort of without faith and without recognizing the small answers that have been sent to me. So here are a few of the blessings I've found in my life the past couple of days.
- Yesterday when I was to tired that I didn't know if I could make it home from the library that was only 10 minutes away, I prayed that my kids would take naps so that I could get some rest. Well 30 minutes after falling asleep the baby woke up and my 3 year old was still playing in her room. I was upset that my prayer wasn't answered, but then I stopped and realized that I HAD gotten a nap, and I DID feel quite a bit better. I also told myself that I would do what I could with what energy I had, and then not worry about the rest.
- Despite getting up 2-3 times last night, I wasn't too tired this morning.
- My husband was home last night to help me jump the car (one of the kids left a light on), bathe the kids, and get them in bed, then proceeded to help me fold laundry.